My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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