Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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