I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
God, I missed his penis.
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