you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
