well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
