I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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