she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize
