Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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