Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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