My brain says no but my pants say off.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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