whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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