Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
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