Screwed.edu
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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