Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
