If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
