Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
