I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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