Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize