I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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