Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
We smell like vodka and hangover
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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