it wasn't lemon gatorade
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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