I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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