like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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