I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
