a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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