just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
MIDGETS
????
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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