This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
