it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
wow bdsm is so cute
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
