he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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