I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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