Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
