Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
