Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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