Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize