Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
