I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
