we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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