Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
