So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
