I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
