And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
