my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
