i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
