i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
