Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Randomize
