It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
