Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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