Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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