I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
