Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Randomize